Aren’t women amazing? We are independent, self-sufficient and resilient. You can kick us , and like a ball, we bounce back. We endure unimaginable circumstances and we put on our make up and we are ready to face the world again. Like a fly on a wall, I have been observing all the women around me. I have also been analysing my responses to external stimuli and I am of the view that there are two main things that women need.
Firstly, women need, not want AFFECTION. Make no mistake, I am not referring to expensive gifts when you say something insensitive or when you forget an important date! I am in fact talking about affirming your love for your woman. A random phone call during the day to gently remind her that her beauty far exceeds the setting of the sun will suffice. Send her an unexpected message that she is the north to your compass. Make an effort to let her know that you value her in your life. Be reminded that we live in time where there are a multitude of easily accessible options. The all inviting “DM” is the genesis of many romantic conversations that eventually turn into the physical romancing. If you continue to be insensitive and assume that your woman knows that you are still attracted to her, you will soon have to slide into another “DM”.
I think women crave AFFECTION and not ATTENTION. If we are shown affection regularly, then there is no need for us to seek validation by posting pictures on social media and nervously awaiting likes. The most amazing women that I know do not have social media accounts. They are in what appears to be happy , fulfilling relationships with partners who are not afraid to show them affection. When a woman is not shown affection, she will succumb to a few kind words and her vulnerability will be preyed upon by fast talkers. It takes effort to show affection, but if she means a lot to you, you will go to the end of the earth to see her smile. If you do not see a future with her, then please let her go and stop wasting her time.
Showing affection is not expensive. You can remember important dates and anniversaries, use your smart phones to mark the dates on your calendar. You can pick fresh flowers and attempt to make a floral arrangement for her. You can take the initiative to make plans for a date. Not necessarily a fancy restaurant. A very good friend of mine arranged his room like a restaurant , menu and all and his girlfriend was thrilled that he made that great effort. Comment below if you want me to expand on low budget but meaningful dates. Remember to tell your woman that you like the way she did her hair, and that her make up enhances her model-like face. If you fail to do this, someone else will.
Secondly, women NEED to be listened to. When a woman talks to you, she is not asking for advice. She is not seeking a solution for her dilemma. She is not requesting your perspective of the situation. Most times we just want you to spend some time actively listening to what we perceive to be an issue. It may be trivial to you, you may be able to clearly see the answer to the problem, but I beg you, keep it to yourself. If we want your opinion, we will GIVE IT TO YOU. On the rare occasion that we ask for your opinion, we go with the alternative. For instance, if we ask your opinion on matching a pair of shoes with an outfit and you suggest the black shoes matches the black dress . I can assure you that we will be wearing the red shoes with a touch of red lipstick. We never ask a question without knowing the answer. I told you that we are amazing!
Ladies, I must admit that we oftentimes talk too much. I have a particular friend that does not like relax her tongue. She still expects to be listened to . A lot of partners expect the benefits of having a girlfriend without the duties that comes with it. If you neglect to listen to her, someone else will. Again, be reminded that she can easily find a replacement. There are exes waiting for her to realise that you are simple and without ambition and they will treat her better than you. There are best friends waiting for her to realise her worth and to give them a chance to exit the “friendzone”. I am not asking you to move mountains to make us happy, I am asking that you listen to us and show us affection. Am I right ladies?
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
About the Author: Antoinette Sydney LLB LEC CAMLFC CFRMP, Bar No. SYA2015211, Attorney at Law. The author is the first Online Lawyer based in Trinidad and Tobago. Her entire Law Practice is based Online using technology. Client meetings are conducted at mutually meeting points. She has clients in Guyana, St Vincent, Barbados, the British Virgin Islands and North America. She specializes in Corporate Law and Anti-Money Laundering Compliance. She helps clients to start their Online Business Empire.
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Consulting services and much more.